Today I was great-full for a wonderful weekend....
I thanked my children for getting ready so well this morning......
I told my girls how beautiful they are.....
I made Christmas tree shaped cheese and biscuits......
I went for a walk with my husband and son and we bumped unexpectedly into numerous friends that we otherwise may not of caught up with before Christmas.....
I held my son tightly and kissed him each time I got him out of the car....
I got my children a cup of milk and snack before they asked.....
I was extra patient and calm today....
I read to my children two extra books this evening.....
Last night while driving home quiet late from Ocean Grove a car that was speeding and overtaking on a bend narrowly missed us.....head on.
In the previous town i'd slowed down a little to show the kids the lights, if I'd not done this I'd hate to think what could of happened to my family.....
After we were safe I honked my horn, we didn't need to swerve of the road or anything , but I can still just see the headlights in our eyes.
Thankfully a few moments later we had to stop for a train...I held my husbands hand, tears wanting to fall, I looked back at my children, safely asleep....what if? was all I could think, I thought of my family and the loved ones we'd just kissed goodbye ....what if....?
Thank you for looking out for us and protecting us...I wish everyone especially the young could be guaranteed safety and protection....but they cannot...our hearts break and we sob why? Tonight i am thinking of the many precious young souls and those brave heroes who were taken from their families.

Ho Ho Ho!......

Hello!  I hope everyone is enjoying the season, the beginning of holidays for many of us in Aussie land!
I love holidays, I love warm weather, I love Christmas, I love giving and receiving presents, I adore my memories of Christmas and Santa and watching Christmas carols on the 24th and love that those experiences are our children's now to have, I love the family catch ups, the drinks with friends and the bubbley with sisters and cousins, I love planning the coming year with my husband, our children excitedly decorating the tree, Christmas shopping, making decorations and surprise visits from Santa at (it seems) every gathering during December!
I'm blessed that I get to be at home during this busy time and that work deadlines are not interfering with Christmas planning and the numerous events that pop up.  I used to be that person, working huge hours, busiest time of the year  that we'd been planning for since early October.  I once worked Christmas Day, it was toward the end of my Chef apprenticeship  and I swore never to do that again.
Sometimes we are in a rush or the day is not working out as planned or we are trying to juggle many things at once...I know but try to think of the beauty in the season, look at the children around you counting down the sleeps, stop competing for the best Turkey, Center piece, outfit and appreciate those pesky relatives that you dread,  take your time to get to your destination if your late...to bad, don't fight it, go with it, smile when things go wrong and continue on and if your a lucky one blessed with time to count sleeps until Santa's arrival than appreciate those less fortunate for whatever reason, show some compassion and forgiveness and top it of with a smile!!!  HO HO HO....xx

What are you up to?

Today we are.....
Painting faces
Making and eating healthy cookies!!!
One of us resting with a bad cough
Playing Lego
Dodging small Lego pieces in bare feet
Washing new outfits ready for the warm weather ahead
Planning a lavish waterfront picnic and my trip to Sydney next year
Making Christmas decorations and lazing by the fire....
Waiting very patiently for Ben to return home, me to finish sewing the advent calendar, summertime and Santa!!!!!

No computer!?....

A quick little write today while our muffins are a cookin'.  We've had a great little week and although a touch of gastro stopped it in its tracks (almost) we've recuperated with movie overdose and some much needed gardening!  The unfortunate part to the week (apart from two sick Little's) was the girls missing their ballet break-up oh and I missed out on a very cool outdoor setting on eBay.
Today my husbands laptop ( which is nearly bigger than our analogue tv) (we really are very tech poor) decided to stare at me with a blank screen.....I've tapped it in the right places, control, alt and deleted it  6 times and of course reloaded it a few times.... Nope nothing.  I promised myself that today I would catchup on blogs and nurture my own a little and I'm finding the whole experience a little constrictive on my Iphone.  My eyes are squinting, my hand is cramping and I'm over the limit in data so Golly knows how much this afternoon is going to cost me!!
I hope that everyone is well, I'm still not jogging, still haven't made that appointment to Physio but am weaning myself of the pressure bandage that I'm living in and am looking forward to the next chapter when I can start walking with the pram again, while dreaming of the day I can run freely to the point of exhaustion.  Who would of thought while doing all the right things, stretching, shoe inserts, new shoes, staggered training, healthy diet and pacing myself that I could hurt my leg in such a way that has taken about 7weeks to recover.  I'm sure there is a lesson in this for me somewhere down the track (another lesson in patience perhaps)
Well I'm of for a cuppa and to continue sewing some Christmas decorations, another lesson in patience there! Xx

My Little Ballerina's.....

Yesterday Scarlett and Lily had their Ballet Recital, It's their second year at ballet and last year Lil was very upset and frightened at the prospect of being dropped of at the theatre without mama (this is surprising as Lil is usually quite brave in these situations and Scarlett freaks out) anyway this year my girls and all of the littlies were so excited, they had so many questions,  there was so much noise and anticipation "do we go up yet Miss?"  "Excuse me, when can we put this (bright red lipstick) on?"  (only one little sweetie attempted this herself) and  yes I got called Miss and Renee and Mum!??  I just loved it it's such an exciting day, these little angels are so brave and cute and the older girls are so beautiful and nurturing as they pop down to admire the cuteness, taffeta and make-up everywhere amongst the 4 & 5 year olds.

I am most definitely "one of those Mums" although I'm modest out loud, inside I am bursting at the seams!!!  I've never been so proud seeing my baby girls so excited and independent for a moment as they go out on stage.  It's their thing, we as Mama's  only watch them at the end of each term on viewing day so its very exciting for the families to see the big performance.  I have tears in my eyes each and every time I watch them dance if I was alone those tears would wet my face.  

My sister in law is a dancer and my mother in law was very involved and adored the ballet as do I and so it's a family thing for us also, I know my beautiful mother in law watches these little angels from heaven with a proud tear in her eye.

Ands so now we enjoy a break from buns and tutu's, they will be replaced with bathers, salty hair and tanned skin.  xx   

A little bit of lately.....

Sunny for a day or two and then fireplace roaring, t-shirts and sunscreen and than chicken  soup cooking on the stove.  Yes summer is teasing us although we are all hopeful that it shall soon be lovely and warm....regularly.
 Christmas to do lists are on fire.  Last year I made a recycled fabric wreath for our door and I received some lovely feedback and so this year I'm sewing an advent calendar and also some Christmas tree decorations, I will take some photo's once they're under way!  I've also  started Christmas shopping and I'm sticking to a budget this year, does anybody else find that once they start they cannot stop?!!  We have a lot of social commitments of late which is fun and keeps us busy until Ben returns home, also a kinder concert in a couple of weeks and Saturday is the girls Ballet recital which I'm more excited about than them...almost.
 The kids, myself and my Dad went to a Christmas Fete on Sunday, a beautiful day so relaxing, the kids overdosed on sugar and played with the animals and rode go-carts Eddy was deliberately trying to clip the edge of the witches hat  with the wheel of the go-cart and while concentrating so hard on lining it up he rode over everything in his path including the attendant and most of the inflatable boundary.  The entire crowd was in hysterics while my  little boy caused complete chaos on the track.  I had a few photo's to upload of the day however my computer decided the images were not video or photo and could not be uploaded.
My leg update is so so, I was beginning to feel as though  I'd been beaten  by the pain, I was having to take painkillers twice a day for 5 days and this was upsetting me sooo much, I'm definitely a "let your body fight it" type of girl I even managed to birth my beautiful boy without any assistance.  Mum suggested a tubey thing (it's like a tight bandage) and blow me down it works, no more sharp pain or throbbing, no more waking at 4am no more crying while doing the dishes (a crazy day and painful and then the dog ate two more of our pet chickens!)  Yep I was losing that battle for a while, point being listen to your Mums!!
We are all well and happy though looking after each other and feeling quite inspired by the (slow) change in seasons, I'm trying to do little bits and pieces in the garden and dreaming of Christmas feasts and creative nibbles for all of those picnics and drinks in the summery future!  We are yet to build our mud kitchen in the garden, once my leg heals there are many things I'd like to catch up on but meanwhile being forced to slow down and sew (for example) is really, really good for me and almost what I've needed. xx

I would like to...

Be within the first twenty women to finish a fun run.
Learn to use our Nikon manually
Be pregnant next year,
Be a peaceful, happy mama everyday
Find the time to indulge in more creative activities
Grow a flourishing veggie garden
Watch my daughters dance in their end of year recital
Be there for my husband
Have a big messy Christmas full of family, wrapping paper, food and laughter
Sew some curtains
Remember all of my childrens funny and inquisitive moments
Hold my husband tight

One happy day from many on our recent camping trip.........

Nethercote Falls, Pambula  NSW

                                     

                                     

                                      

                                      

                                      

                                      

A couple of months ago......

     As the wind blew a little warmer and the spring flowers started to bloom all over our property I said to my husband  "there's a change in the air".  And yes we have come to accept some good changes that we have control over or have talked about and "planned" and those that make me feel as though I am  free falling...without a parachute.
 If you know me well you will know that once in awhile I fall apart I feel overcome I will shout or cry or both and then just as quickly.....peace, calm and strength return.  Sometimes I do this on my own other times its crying to my mum or sisters and many times it's close to my husband so that he can catch me without judgement.
 I am a very sensitive person, also an optimist however there are times that I'm not.  I am a hard worker and quite content however every now and again I feel under pressure, a little scared...no fight left.  Sometimes I don't believe in my abilities enough for them to drive me forward.
  I wish that I was smarter......   I've only mentioned this to a close  few as it really embarrasses me to my core.  It prevents me from taking on new roles and following my dreams.  I have a  terrible memory, I wish that I could remember ten names off  the bat, that I could read an article and remember content and dates accurately....but I cannot. And so I try to avoid situations where I am required to recall information, I don't study, the idea of a trivia night scares the hell out of me, I used to shy from meeting new people and I don't seem to follow particular dreams. I am restricted by fear even though I teach my children not to fear anything and that if they do to challenge it....face it.
And so with this warm spring scented wind I am accepting my dreams with a touch of reality, I am taking them seriously and wondering "what if" rather than "maybe one day".  There's a shift in my focus, our focus, my husband and I.  I am challenging my fears ever so slightly.  xx

Lately.....

This past week I've felt like Dorothy from the wizard of Oz and I've been for a ride in the house in the tornado and  CRASH!......I've recently landed again.........
Holidays are over, Fun run is over,  my phone has died , Ben has flown out, Kids have been sooo out of routine with holidays and daddy home and now the sun is going to bed later!!! and did I mention the crutches!?
I need to get my groove back!
This arvo the children were very "emotionally unstable" and  hungry and it seemed to be dinner time and so I just started cooking and we ate and  cleaned up and played out side for a little before bath time and then I checked the clock because recently I've assumed it was 7ish only to realise it was 9ish (and thus the emotionally unstable children!")  It was 4.50pm!!!  What had I done! It felt so right! Dinner was like afternoon tea and it wasn't going to be dark for another three hours!!!
This is me lately....Hopping around in a daze, routines out the window, everything taking 5 times longer to do, I've been a terrible friend, I was terrified when the tsunami warning went out to the Hawaii Islands where my parents are staying and I've been forced to take things a little slower or to do less actually.
The girls have a day at the farm for kinder tomorrow and I should be getting their lunches organised however I cannot be bothered and that means chaos tomorrow most likely but these crutches are wearing me out.....Seriously I had no idea the effort involved in hopping around all day and having to rethink the way in which I do most things eg,  Hmmm I've just successfully been to the fruit store, the children helped me by carrying a basket each, the staff brought the box of produce out to the car for me and of we went.  Arriving home sore and tired with three hungry children I wondered to myself how do I get the BOX of fruit and veggies up the steps and into the kitchen!?  I will do a post on this latest accessory of mine and some handy tips in the future.
Recently I did a post and  it was quite mmmm raw or real.  It made me edit it 5 times and question whether it was to personal, to inward,  also I had not planned it to take on the path that it did I had began writing with something else in mind and took a wrong turn.  I've still not published it and perhaps it's not that big a deal to others but to me its admitting a flaw of mine that I am quite aware of and is taking a lot of work for me to get over and accept.  I hope to be brave and publish it I've given it a lot of thought and this blog is based on honesty in the hope that it might help others or inspire them and also it's a record for my children who knows what's around the corner.....They will have this.
That's not to say that I publish everything, there are personal things that are kept close to my heart and our little family and these obviously affect me emotionally, the emotions I'm happy to write about.
So what else, I'm feeling tired and so will finish up but I am missing training with the girls and running.  Yesterday Ed and I took a milkshake and iced coffee break at the park by the lake and while we were slurping Ed looked at me and asked "Can we go for a run Mum?"  "Oh I would love to" I replied while pointing to my leg, so chuffed that he is missing our "thing" as much as me.
The other quick thing before I crash is last night I bought a Magnum ice cream (I've not had a nightly binge since the sugar challenge) and I ate it all, these things are huge and sweet and chocolaty and it was okay, I couldn't finish it, but did and wondered to my self what have I done! Anyhow Good night Sleep tight. xx

Crutches and happy thoughts.....

Sitting here this afternoon watching my children and our friends children play happily, I'm feeling blessed and content.  Conversations between adults coming and going, both fireplaces burning, pork roasting on the Webber.
This was a snap shot of our home last week after my friend and my 11km Fun run experience.  (my first of many, hopefully).  I ran it in 55mins, I crossed the line number 341 out of approx 870 participants.  However I hurt my leg in the last 100mt and hopped aided over the line.  I've been to physio for the second time  and not much has improved  and so a bone scan is next on the cards. I'm very keen to get back on my feet and today I started thinking about running and am missing it and a little worried about the length of time recovery may take, it's bloody sore at times I know that much and to be honest I thought I'd be back on my feet by now.
Ben flies out this week I was quite worried as to how I would manage but am feeling more confident now, the kids think the crutches are cool and Little Bear calls them rails, Ed shoots things with them and  I want to throw them at the wall sometimes.  I'm thankful however that Ben has been home and that it happened at the end of the run and that I'm able to drive and hop around usually pain free, it's not permanent and I will run again soon.
 Also I have destroyed another phone and have no house phone it will be 2-3 weeks before Telstra can hook me up with another phone as they're only distributing the new model that they've run out of.  So I'm not making much contact lately but am checking facebook and emails and your welcome to drop by, just ignore the mess!!  xx

Eddy Spaghetti..........

Love this age.....

Love the games....

Love the cuddles and the snuggles.....

Love the funny stories.........

Love the belly laughter.....

Love the acts of kindness...........

Love the boy things, the fascination with diggers and "fighting things" and how things work....

Love the bond between his siblings and his Dad....

Love him.........

Holiday fun!

Sleep ins (in theory), not having to rush out of the door (stay at home mum),  weather warming (very slowly) Yes It has been been September holidays!  Some holidays we spend at home intent on staying in our pajamas for as long as possible, others we might go away as a family usually a beach of some description. These holidays (of which Ben has been away for most of) we've been enjoying day trips. It's been relaxing and exciting, coming and going as we please and only travelling an hour or two here and there so apart from a few snacks not much planning is involved...relaxing.

There is so much to offer children these days and much of it dosen't need to be expensive.  I recently  came across an app which locates the nearest and dearest local parks,  fantastic if your'e planning a road trip with children and also for discovering new playgrounds in your local area. Also the local library, I think many family's have forgotten about the old  library.   Library's are such a great tool for children's imagination and learning they offer a range of Cd's and Dvd's as well as storytimes and activities for school holidays, not forgetting the thousands of books on offer.  The best part  is that its  free and younger children can enjoy a little independence browsing and choosing there own books. Another loved  freebie is of course play dates!  What child does not enjoy having friends to play with while us parents enjoy the company of others, whether its at a park with a picnic or inside with a coffee its so lovely to ignore the call of the ironing and catch up with friends instead.

With a little more free time on our hands we've made a couple of trips to the beach these holidays, wind in our hair, salt on our lips and the smell of summer evoking glorious memories!  My children love the beach as do my husband and I and we love to nick down for a coffee while the children run free and we all reinvigorate!

  My sister and brother also live in Ocean Grove and Geelong so it's lovely to catch up especially with a new bub in the family...we are all absolutely smitten, she is adorable....Ahh!

With school holidays comes the release of many new children's films at the cinema and I try to take the children most holidays.  It is, as many of you know quite expensive but its such a lovely holiday treat for all.  These holidays we saw Madagascar 3 it was fantastic the children and their cousin loved it as did my sister in law and I.  Another treat for the children was a visit to the Werribee Open Range Zoo.  We caught up with a bunch of Ben's family and had a great day.  The weather was glorious! The children were free and the animals were beautiful especially the Meerkats and Giraffes.  All Miss S wanted to see were the Giraffes and while we were driven through their paddock the keepers were feeding them they came so close we could of touched them so so beautiful,  it was a wonderful experience. We love Giraffes!!

And so now we are coming to the end of the holidays and they've been wonderful, even the days spent at home tackling the ironing while the children put glitter everywhere.  We made popcorn and planted veggies and picked flowers too.

Next week is the begining of  the final Term for the year, wow where did that time go?!!  I'm excited about summer and the girls Ballet recital and my up and coming first ever fun run! The count down is on....

We are delaying the new term though with an impromptu camping trip!!  Ben is home and we're taking the camper trailer up to Mallacoota and then on to Pambula for a week or so where we will meet up with my Brother and Sister in law and their bubs at her parents beautiful property.  All very excited, the girls have already packed  and once the weather clears we are off.

I hope everyone has enjoyed themselves these holidays and kept safe and well! xx

Reflecting on their first....

Today I have sore tonsils (thanks Emmy!) and am a little bit Blah and although I've been good and hung out the washing, vacuumed and mopped I cannot be bothered doing anything else, I'm done!! This is frustrating  but I'm not going to fight it, so here I am on the computer while Ben and the children are out....Bless him.

We've had a ball these school hols and I cannot believe that after one more term my girls will be in PREP and Mr Spaghetti  in 3YR KINDER.  I'm so excited for them and yet I can already feel the sadness and sentiments rolling  in.  We are nearing the end of such a large chapter....Their first.  What a long beautiful journey of amazing accomplishments and sleeplessness, watching these three little babes grow and become these wonderful, funny, beautiful, clever people with such big personalities and hearts.  I did not know that I could love them so much, I did not know that they would make me laugh and feel so proud and also drain me of EVERYTHING at times.....

I did not know that I would find some aspects so easy and some aspects so challenging...a work in progress.

My advice to women thinking of babies is to be proud and confident as a woman,  accept change, love and appreciate yourself, know yourself and be ready to give and to learn extreme amounts of patience. Be honest, enjoy and indulge in the little things and trust your self.
I love being mama to Lily, Scarlett and Eddy and Step mum to Cooper, four special little hearts held within mine. xx

Puree's, Porridge and Painkillers

What is the universe trying to tell me?
Ben arrived home last Wed morning  (yay!)  and we had planned to have friends for dinner, spend the weekend with Cooper (my stepson),  and enjoy a couple of outings with the kids.  I also hoped to get my hair done (so many greys) and sneak down to Ocean Grove for a surf (my first in over a year).
Wednesday after I'd been to training Ben had noticed that our lovely Poodles the chook and Neville the rooster were missing.  Oh no!  (that was not a sarcastic oh no! but a real "can't be true, I'm still missing my dog not the chooks as well, Oh No!"  But "Oh Yes", our beloved Poodles and Neville and their shiny bright feathers and perfectly formed eggs (Poodles not Nevilles) were gone.
The next day after kinder and a run around the lake with my husband, (our first ever run together, I was so stoked).  It was my hardest run ever actually.  Usually the last 2kms is sheltered, not on Thursday, I had  a strong head on wind blowing the pusher back into me and the last kilometer took everything I had. I wanted to stop so many times and kept talking myself out of it anyway got there and later in the day after a cuppa and thinking about dinner I experienced abdominal pains similar to those in child birth! ( I was checked by the Dr and it was hopefully a one off) however it caused me to black out and hit both my head and chin while cracking my jaw.  Oooops! I tell you my darling husband misses a lot of events while working away from home but thankfully he was home for this.  I got fixed up and now apart from sleeping a lot and being limited to eating purees and soups I'm quite fine.
 However I'm wondering what have I done?  Why my dog, my chickens and my jaw!?  I'm still trying to work that one out and I know these moments of bad luck are nothing compared to what some families and/or individuals are going through but still is there a lesson in this for me??x

Weekend thoughts...

School holidays Hooray!!  Our plans these holidays have already flown out the window and the weekend has flown buy in a haze of pain killers and pureed soup.
 My beautiful man is home and it's been lovely although I feel guilty as I've really done nothing accept stare at the fridge and drop my lip.  I've been a hermit since Thursday night and am beginning to feel blaa...  I think this afternoon will be a trip to the veggie shop and then hire a dvd for tonight.  Two more sleeps until Ben returns to work and it is quite normal for me to start feeling quietly anxious and regretful (Did we do enough?  Did I tell Ben I love him enough?  Did I put in enough effort?  Are there any jobs that need doing?  How will I cope when I wake and he's gone?) Yes, Yes,  Yes, One and same as usual snap out of it and ENJOY it Jodes!
 Tomorrow we are meeting friends at the Werribee Open Range Zoo it shall be a fun day,  fresh air and smiles and hopefully  undisrupted sunshine.  I'm really looking forward to it lots of holding hands and kids yelling out in delight also we will hopefully have time to visit my new niece and sisters on the way home.
  For now though the children are with Daddy out on the newest addition to our home, the Tyre swing!!  Its creating a lot of laughter in our backyard at the moment even though when I look out there from the deck I can see the empty Chook pen...sob sob...another job for the school holidays after I accept our loss.  I am such a sook, I know.  Any how the tyre swing is attached to a very very long rope from a very very high tree and gets A LOT of air!!  We actually had to chop another tree to allow for this massive air!!
In the cracked jaw department I've had no Pain Killers today and I managed to chew very carefully three piklets and they were amazing, overdosed in Maple Syrup and cream (I had no luck chewing strawberries) and even my husband commented on how good they were...No sugar honey, woo hoo!!

 To make them the children threw in half a bowl of Wholemeal Plain flour (say 4 cups), 2 tsp Bi-Carb, 3 tblsp Chia seeds, 1 1/2 tsp cinnamon, 1 Vanilla bean, Two eggs and milk  (roughly 2 1/2cups) until a nice consistency.  Yummo quick and easy lemon squeezey!xx

Beginnings and Endings

8am last week driving along to kinder chatting about ballet concerts and plans for the day and I realize I cannot keep my eyes on the road.  I'm scanning either side my heart beating faster each time I notice a dark shadow or log in the long grass.  Suddenly in between Ballet something and  "do we have snacks?" tears begin falling....Will Heid's make back it home?......

Turning Julia up on the radio to drown out my sniffles I continue driving and searching, a part of me saying "this is ridiculous" and the other saying "she has to come back she cannot of just gone!?"....

I remember the morning Ben brought that cute little puppy home to our little rental at Ocean Grove, a tiny little black puppy quite unexpected yet instant love, our little family of one dog now becoming two.  It was quickly decided that her name be Heidi, she was always hiding in funny places.  That seems so long ago, before children, weddings and mortgages.  Our time then was divided between working long hours, surfing and dreaming with our black smiling dogs all while being in love. 

So so much has changed since then our dreams are becoming our reality and we are growing older and wiser, that life and lifestyle along with our beautiful dogs are now happy memories that we share.  It was mine and Ben's beginnings and those beautiful dogs that shared it are now loving memories too....x

A little dark hole....

It had been two weeks since my last workout and I was chomping at the bit!!  Sunday we went for a 2km jog, the girls on bikes and Mr Spaghetti in the pusher it was a beautiful day and so nice to be getting some vitamin D...finally.  Afterwards a play at the park  and quick catch-up with friends while I drooled over those able to jog freely for as long as they desired.
Monday was finally the day!!  The children were healthy and the car running smoothly and so of to kinder and then time to run....I was so keen and ready to improve on my time...bring it on!
6km later and a slight feeling of nausea  mixed with elation and I was on cloud nine, best time ever and proud as punch.
This run however symbolized a lot more than just running better, faster.  My weekend consisted of an overdrive in hormones resulting in feelings of blue and grey, that mixed with the realization that my dog is missing and that my son needed to be put to bed roughly twenty-eight times.  I NEEDED this run and I new that I could climb out of that hole at the bottom of the hill and get back to the top!!!  And there I was QUEEN OF THE MOUNTAIN!!! (I allow myself an enlarged ego directly after a run!)
 Challenge yourself, push yourself, If your unhappy with a a part of yourself  or your life CHANGE IT,  It may take a couple of weeks, a year or seven attempts to get to the first step of your goal, but if you continue to remind yourself of your goals and why you want to reach them,  keep inspiring yourself let others inspire you, have gentle reminders and be okay with failing, I believe its trying again that's the real test....Dont give up, GET TO THE TOP OF YOUR MOUNTAIN!!.x

Up close....

Sometimes In true Piscean form I want to withdraw from the world and hide

Sometimes I am much to sensitive to the people around me and I hurt deep inside

Sometimes I get so frustrated that others are wasting there energy and influence with negativity

Sometimes I feel so alone and vulnerable that I cry and long for my husbands embrace

Sometimes I miss that embrace so much that I withdraw from communication while he's away

Sometimes I wish others would see me as quite simply whats in front of them

Sometimes I shy away from compliments and I hope that does not offend

Sometimes I look at a stranger and whisper to myself..."bless them"

Sometimes I am so affected by an unexpected smile

Sometimes I feel so proud that my insides want to burst out
Sometimes I love so much that a tear comes to my eye...x

Sunny Days

Happy Fathers day (for yesterday)  to all of the dads out there.
 We had a beautiful sunshine filled day at home spent with my Dad, Sister and brother in law and of course my three cuties (unfortunately Mum and Ben were at work).  We enjoyed a light lunch, bush walk, lots of catching up and the kids played very excitedly with Aunty Laura and Auncle Sam, everything from Barbies and throwing rocks into the dam to an hours play on the Trampoline while dad and I tackled the lawns.  We finished of the day with scones jam and cream.  Its these moments that Ben and I cherish, it's why we bought our block of land, we can come home and chillout, no need to be entertained, you can wonder and be with your thoughts or laugh as loud and excitedly as your lungs will allow and its okay.
 Scarlett and I planted some seeds in the veggie garden earlier, Spring onions, Cos, Rocket lettuce and Carrot seeds and we noticed our Radish seeds are beginning to pop through, we're all very excited by this and are hoping to improve on last years "beginners" crop or lack of.  The chickens are also looking well, Poodles the black fluffy one should resume laying soon and Neville the rooster is looking glorious and shiny strutting his stuff around the yard, we shall  be purchasing some new chicks in the coming weeks to replace those we lost last year.
I'm hoping everyone has had a marvelous week we were luckily enough to, of course welcoming Spring with open arms was easy and glorious, we felt the need to celebrate with french toast and berries (Miss S couldn't believe we were eating "french" food, exclaiming  that we were eating what people in other countries are eating!.....adorable), and of course celebrating the arrival of a new bub...ahhh. Also this week our car has been (unexpectedly) at the mechanics the past week and although I was heavily disappointed to miss training and  meet my little niece it has been a wonderful sunny week to stay at home and hangout.  Speaking of training as well as  missing Wednesdays session I missed today's run, I have done some core training (of which I'm supposed to be doing every 3rd day at least...oooops!), It's another challenge I'm taking part in through Fitness Food and Style although  I haven't given it 100% I'm probably managing 3 work-outs a week however it's not the complete Killer Core and Cardio routine that Jackie at Crabtree fitness organised for us .  I want to take this seriously and I will hopefully get back on track by allocating specific time for this.
Two other challenges that  I'd mentioned in earlier posts were the sugar challenge and also to cut down on my spending. I managed the latter quite sucesfully  and I'm enthusiastic to keep going  although  a change in the season means a change in wardrobe!  The Sugar Challenge was a great success and I'm now reaping the following benefits:

 1.  My energy levels are balanced, I'm no longer falling in a heap at 6.30pm and no longer having "tired and         grumpy" moments
2.  I'm going to bed earlier each night.
3.  I'm falling asleep without a struggle.
4.  I've created healthier eating habits.
5. Am generally more energetic which was ultimatley my goal!!
Good night and Happy Spring to you all. x

Spring has Sprung!

I never mean't to have such a break in between posts and I've never felt stuck for anything to say in this blog so far, until recently....I think I was just quietly content, enjoying a comfortable silence.
Ben is of course back at work and we enjoyed such a warm sunny day one of three in the past weeks, blossom on the trees, our radish seedlings are sprouting, the birds are singing every morning, the sun...oh that glorious sun I LOVE YOU! and most recently and so excitingly I have a new niece Malia!!!  I'm so so excited and what a perfect time of year to be born, she is one day old today.
 Love Spring and also Summer, Autumn and Winter the beginning of a new season means change to our eating, style and activities, it changes our perspectives on our surroundings, living in the bush amongst the gumtrees I love to watch the changing colours and textures around us It's so inspiring to me and definately puts a smile on my dial.
This morning the kids have played tea sets, cubby's and block cities with basket/pipe cleaner semi trailers carting the blocks around the house.  I love seeing them play in this way and I'm so excited that my niece Iluka now has a best buddy to grow and play with, you just cannot beat it...joy.
 This afternoon the children and I are going to get muddy in the garden, there is SOO much to do out there but rather than get frazzled I will look beyond the overgrown grass, felled trees that need stacking and sticks and bark to be raked and I will do little by little and enjoy the fresh air and beautiful surroundings.  Another mission we have in the garden is to fill up the sand pit and improve the kids play area with a swing, mud kitchen and gravel pit for the trucks...we will get there.  I will post photo's of before and after, am yet to improve my skills in those areas, I shall one day have beautifully shot photo's with amazing light and juxtaposed objects!

Weekend pieces

Little Bears favorite thing in the world,
found like this.........

and like this.......
A naughty puppy making her mark.

Fixed by daddy with love.

Secrets shared on top of the ute.....

Miss S.....

Where there's Heidi there's a stick...

Mr Spaghetti.....

Gumboots all the way....

Plum the naughty puppy and me....

Thoughtful hubby....

Good food after hard work.....

Playtime....

My boys...sent me this while
I was at the hairdressers...